Thursday, 26 July 2018

Conan Exiles Rant

I've been playing Conan Exiles on the PS4 since it was released, paying a ridiculous £45 for a game that isn't finished and doesn't work. I was pissed when I wasted £30 on 7 Days to Die on the PS4 but Conan makes that look like deal of the god damn century. Let's start with the bugs: from poor hit detection to some enemies being invulnerable to your attacks, mostly when under tents for some reason. This is a pain when dealing with archers, who slowly back away when you approach them and can be a nuisance to lure out. Destroying the tent seems to fix this problem though. Then there's the ability to teleport with summoning stones to different parts of the map, and this is a good way to get around the maps different zones, as long as you don't get killed by something as you're loading into the area. That's a bit of a nuisance.

The dodge mechanic can bug out and have you roll back into the original place you rolled from. This can be an issue when under attack by multiple threats, and you can't escape quickly because your evade does nothing. The climbing is dodgy at best, from falling through walls to not grabbing them when prompted. Oh, and I can't forget the map border, as in most games the map is a certain size. If you go past the boundaries you're usually given a warning to turn back or take damage over time, or there is a pesky invisible wall to stop your progress. Not Conan though. Nope, Conan has an instant death mechanic when you curious people step outside the map, but not only that, your body will be flung even further into the abyss meaning, if like me you went in there with lots of loot having just visited Conan himself in a bar, and having gathered some rhino hide, all that good loot is gone.

You can enslave thralls to help quicken up building times. You can also use them as back up, that is if they don't fall through the floor or just disappear all together, like has happened to me multiple times, meaning that if I want to kill any bosses I need to wait for my friends to come on line, as I don't know if I take a gang of thralls out whether they'll fall through the world or just vanish never to be seen again. Let's talk about journeys missions to help you level up faster; I had issue getting the light armor journey, and now I've read that another journey (Survive the Purge) is broken.

Well okay, I can't fight bosses but I can build, and this is why I'm posting this rant because the god damn tower I built (called the Tower of Terror, btw) decided to just delete half the flooring on my top level, meaning most my roof has gone with it. This is annoying, but what really puts the icing on this turd cake is the fact I can't replace any of the flooring or the roofs. I've tried putting down more support pillars, even though the foundation is still there, but NO, you can't build there anymore, because fuck you. We've also had a trebuchet disappear and one of my friends built a party house, which they spent a good couple of hours making and decorating, which also just vanished.

So in other words, don't buy this broken mess. It is fun with friends but when it has so many insufferable bugs that leave you wanting to punch a hole in your TV, what's the point? All I know is I hope Bethesda get Fallout 76 right, because if that plays like 7 Days to Die, Ark or even this god damn mess I think I'll be well and truly done with the survival series of games, well until they figure out how to make them without bug after bug after bug. One more message for Funcom, the developers and publishers of Conan Exiles: pull your fingers out and fix your over priced game. Richee


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